Sarka’s PBC Blog #7 – December 1, 2022

Let’s eat cake

My life was was going smoothly with family, friends, our daughter, and work…until PBC came along. 

Circumstances are very different for everyone when you hear the news that a chronic  illness has entered your life.  You remember the people that were there with you. Which day it was. The season.  That day is remembered. Acutely. My diagnosis came on my birthday. 

My birthday has always been special to me. I looked forward to it with a lot of anticipation. I like to plan it. Maybe, give a few suggestions and certainly have cake!!!

Association: a mental connection or relation between thoughts, feelings, ideas, or sensations. 

I struggled (and still do) for many years to be able to dissociate the day I received my diagnosis, and the time of year it was.  Such opposites in emotions. Wanting to celebrate, but with a  sour taste of diagnosis…It takes my strength, determination and will power to be able to achieve this.  I have shed tears and wanted to disappear from the world.  I find it difficult  to find the right words to explain it. Then, this year I realized that part of my healing is sharing this with you. Thank you you for helping me heal through this journey. 

I am surrounded by family and friends. Their love for me is one of a kind.  That kind of love has super powers. It nurtures you. Heals you. Them celebrating me, is the best present I could get. With them, I am closer and closer to finally put these 2 as far apart as I can.  I had chocolate cake this year.